Today marks 3 years since you passed. It doesn't get easier, but it sure does surprise me how fast the 3 years went by. I remember those days like they were yesterday. There is so much I want to tell you, show you, and talk with you about. I do it all in my head usually, and it sometimes makes me laugh and sometimes it fills my eyes with tears.
You now have a grandchild in college, you have 1 grandchild that is a fresh driver, one is on her way to turning 16, and the youngest grandkids are now reading. I remember when the twins were just learning to talk and say words...I would call you and have them say the words into the phone. I could just see your smile and face light up on the other end of the phone. Remember coaching me through the teething stage? The fevers, sleepless nights, diarrhea filled diapers? Well those teeth are now falling out and they are getting adult teeth now.
The twins are a perfect mix of Adam and I. They are Sweet (sugar) like their Father, and Spicy like their Mamma.It is awesome. Lilly is a mother hen and a people pleaser, and Charlie is a mamma's boy who needs a bit of motivating, but he will be just fine. Lilly has a tad of a drama queen side, but the good thing is, she only lets is roar around Adam and I usually. So, nobody believes us, and we look like we are lying and she looks innocent.
You passed away on the 19th, and on the 20th it was Easter. Easter still isn't my favorite holiday, but I put on my big girl pants so my kids enjoy it. Kids love Easter, and when they are happy so am I. This year on Easter I ended up in urgent care with strep throat. So, I don't see me and Easter getting along anytime soon either.
Pretty ironic...the week of the anniversary of your passing, I get sick and yearn for my mamma even more. I felt sorry for myself, not gonna lie. I was sitting in urgent care alone, with my head resting on my hand. I was thinking... "I would be on the phone with my mom if she were here." I snapped out of it, and realized that I am sure there were many times you felt sorry for yourself, but we didn't notice either. Fake it, Til You Make It, is my new motto. I realized people have it worse off than me, and I am happy my diagnosis was treatable. Just another life lesson that you taught me.
Charlie is going under the knife next month to get his tonsils out, I have already prepped myself for that day. I remember how you always knew what to say, do, or make me feel when I was sick, scared, etc. I will be doing lots of Mamma talk in my head that day.
There is a new show out on NBC called "This Is Us" The lessons of this show and the timing of it, is pretty creepy, but also very calming for me. The mother in the show is played by "Mandy Moore" and she has multiple children at a time. That is not the only tie I have to show either. There is so much more, I can't even begin to tie them back to my life hurdles and milestones.
Everyone misses you like crazy, but we are doing fine. We love the little signs you send us here and there. Keep them coming, and we will keep making you proud.
Love,
Mando
You are the best thing....that ever happened to me.
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